Mapcraft 2 – The Embiggening

I’ve had a couple of blog posts in my head for a while now, and I am promising myself that I will actually type them up at some point. Until then, the awesome filler that is…. MINECRAFT ESCAPADES!

Here’s the new map. Looks a bit different to the old one cos the Cartograph program has had some stuff changed and I just randomly clicked everything. It’s how I roll.

This represents a land about the size of the original Xbox

So from that you can see a few things.

And, in order to get an idea as to just what some of those things are, here are photos of some of them.

Space invader!

Another space invader!

Yet another space invader!

The Green Meanie (AKA the lazy space invader)

So that’s them. Oh, and another thing!

Waka waka waka!

I got the dimensions wrong with ol’ Pac, he’s currently a bit chubby. I’ll get round to shaving some off him one day.

It'll never fly

I had this idea of making an airship. I wanted to make something that would be in the sky, it would throw out a lot of light, and I could navigate my way to far off lands by it. I thought an airship of some kind would fit the bill. Unfortunately, this was before I honed my construction skills on the likes of space invaders, so it is very very shit. Still, it’s filled with lava, and I can see the fucker a mile off, so it’s staying put for now.

Another idea I’ve always wanted to do was to make some underwater glass tunnels, kinda inspired by Bioshock but without whales or bits of aeroplane going past. I started making one.

See them thin white lines in the sea? That's a glass tunnel, that is.

I didn’t get very far, but the idea has potential. Also, these are an absolute cunt to make. You need to build in the sea, which means you can never see anything, and you can drown. Then, when you think you’ve made a solid 4 x 4 of glass, you need to start hollowing it out. If you’ve missed one cube, the thing floods like a fucker. Stick some stone in there, bail out any remaining water with a bucket, replace the torches which inevitably went out with the water, dig the stone out and quickly replace with glass. Repeat for every single step forwards you take. Fucking pain in the ass. However, when you get it right, the end result is pretty fucking sweet.


You can’t tell from the piccy (I know, I looked), but the way the game renders the water outside the tube, it makes it look like the water has been split and is flowing down the sides of the tube. Basically, I’ve made a Moses tube. You need the odd bit of dirt or stone in there to stick a torch to (torches don’t stick to glass), but when it’s all lit up nicely, these things are pretty. I’m probably going to keep going with this and make underwater tunnels everywhere.

Now for something a bit different. There’s a bit of that map which reads “New cave house which you can’t see from this angle”. This is what it looks like from the outside.

I call this the Twat Cave, cos I made it

See how the walls to the left and right of the picture are all smooth and flat? That’s a glitch, which I’ll get to in a bit. The cave! I made a fountain.

This is where I piss

I don’t piss in it really. Anyways, I made this big cave, and then I decided to make my first painting. Paintings are randomly applied to any surface, so it took me a while of putting it up and knocking it down before I found one I liked. But eventually I did.

Donkey Kong!

It’s fucking Donkey Kong! All I need now is Steve Wiebe, Billy Mitchell, several oil rigs’ worth of hot sauce, and this map is perfect. Apart from the glitch.

Yep, this here map has developed a glitch. Many many moons ago, when I was putting the finishing touches to the moat around Castle Greyskull, I loaded the map and a big section was missing. This also included the land to the right of the moat. A fairly hefty chuck of land and water just vanished. Whenever I went to fill the moat in, I’d reload the map and it would vanish.

Since then, I’ve worked out the map editor and fixed the moat, so that’s ok. However, the map-making algorithm still hasn’t forgotten that it is a bit broken on this map, so what it does is generate the next section of land and forgets that it isn’t actually connected to anything. I’ll be sailing along in my boat looking for stuff, and I’ll find a sheer cliff rising out of the water with a few tunnels sticking out the side of it. It’s like someone sliced the beginning of the land away to find the tunnels and bits of ore.

This isn’t a problem, cos it means I can go sailing for 5 mins and find billions of coal and iron. However, it does mean that the level-generating algorithm sometimes throws up the odd bit of oddness. Like, lava that is impervious to water.

See how the lava goes all the way through the water without it making stone everywhere? It’s fucked. And it is also sweet. I’ll find loads of weird stuff that’s gone wrong, but that lava is the most mental. I’m gonna switch zombies back on and pile them into that lava to see what happens.

Anyways, there you go. See you next week! Same Twat time, same Twat channel.

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