SWAT 4 in the modern age

If you want to play SWAT 4 on anything higher than DOS, bear in mind the following points:

  • If you want to skip the intro movies, don’t mouse-click your way through them, press Esc instead. On my Windows 7 64-bit Home Premiumy PC, if I mouse-click though, the game crashes after the intro if you click through. Esc works fine.
  • If you’re not keen on the bajillion years old Unreal engine “jagged is our speciality” graphics, switch on anti-aliasing and all the other good stuff in the Nvidia Control Panel for SWAT4.exe (assuming you’ve got an Nvidia card).
  • If you’re using a widescreen monitor and don’t want to suffer squashed-o-vision, do this: run the game and go through the training mission, when you get to the menu for the first proper mission quit the game, find Swat4.ini, find every mention of Resolution (and there will be several of them) and change them to the res you want, save and close Swat4.ini, and then make the Swat4.ini file read-only. For some reason, SWAT 4 tries to update the file every time you open the game, and this will overwrite your settings. Setting it to read-only will prevent this, but you’ll get a couple of “unable to save” errors when you run the game. Ignore these, for they are lies.
  • Handcuffing a virtual granny, emptying a can of pepper spray into her face and tasering her until the cartridges run out is still hilarious. Especially when she cries “WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?!” It is funny, virtual old woman, now be quiet while I pepper spray you again.
  • I know this will apply to me and only me, and no-one else will ever want to still play SWAT 4 (your loss, it’s still a fucking tremendous game after all the years), but this blog is called “things I need to write down before I forget” for a reason.

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