Shadows of Mordor

Uruk-hai there!

Wow, it’s been a while! How are you? Everything good? Sweet.

So I got talked into playing a Lord of the Rings game. Which is like convincing Hitler to finish Medal of Honour, I guess. I hate Lord of the Rings. Hate it. The movies are fucking terrible, I can’t bring myself to try and read the books, I just don’t get it. So yeah, I wasn’t holding out hope that I’d like a game that has orcs and Gollum and shit in it. And elves can fuck off, too.

I’m even more pissed off now, because Shadows of Mordor is fucking brilliant. It’s like Assassin’s Creed, but good. The combat is like the Batman games, which is excellent. I even like how Gollum is in it, cos the player character wants to gut the weird little bastard.

I’ll keep this brief, cos I’m ill and the baby is rampaging around the living room: if you like running round an open world and brutal combat and decent stealth and shooting people in the eyes with arrows, buy the shit out of this game.


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