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Archive for the ‘Xbox’ Category

Grand Theft Auto (all of ’em)

Steam had a sale to celebrate the 10 year anniversary of GTA 3. The sale was for the entire collection of the main GTA games on PC for £5. I bought it before my brain had processed the signals my eyes received. Pure muscle reflex – anything GTA-related, I will buy it. I got Chinatown […]

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Morrowind

Oblivion was an overrated scrotum, filled with big old boring balls (one of which sounds like Sean Bean, the other Patrick Stewart). Should have been called The Elder Scrolls: Blandia. Almost like Bethesda ran out of imagination, and just decided to make the next Elder Scrolls game as stereotypically fantasy as possible, if you see […]

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Splinter Cell: Chaos Theory

Always loved the Splinter Cell series. The first game introduced the hide and sneak gameplay, the second game introduced the in-game plot twist (“Fisher! You have ten seconds, you have to trust me; shoot that woman now”), the fourth forgot all about the lessons learned above and the fifth turned out to be a game […]

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Oddworld: Stranger’s Wrath

Don’t be put off by the shitty title. Don’t be put off by the association with Abe’s Odyssee and all them games if they weren’t your bag back in the day. Don’t be put off by the fact that this is a very lazy port of an old Xbox game (the original Xbox too, not […]

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The Ultimate List of 2011 (maybe)

Cos, let’s face it, it’ll be the same as last year but with better graphics. Best First Person Puzzle Game: Portal 2 by Valve. It will be amazing, but will be slightly let down by Stephen Merchant’s voice not suiting the game. Random thought while playing – “oh just fuck off, you Barclays-shilling bellend”. Best […]

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The Ultimate List of 2010

Cos you don’t get enough lists at Xmas. Best Game That Is “a bit mental”: Norrland by Cactus. You can download the game from here. There’s also a trailer there, but it’s best to play the game and not know anything about it. Trust me. Oh, and it’s not safe for work or children. Or […]

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